The New Gods

The humanoid mechanism leading the tour had a nasal, grating voice. "If you look to your left, we are approaching Planet 32X7Y, known to its inhabitants as Earth," it regurgitated, reciting from a scripted code input into its hardware soon after coming off the factory line. As the craft hurtled through space, the passengers crowded to the window, ooh-ing and aah-ing in their respective languages at the planet that came into view.

If the guide had emotions it would be feeling a mixture of boredom and disgust. Only the richest of each species could afford to go on this particular space cruise. Though the android had to admit that this job was better than, say, being a crew member with a red shirt.

"All right, if you've seen enough, please follow me into the debriefing room," it chirped, gesturing at the passengers. It led them away from the sight seeing deck and deeper into the craft. A buzz of excitement could be heard from the crowd as they walked down the hallway, eager to finally get the negotiations under way.

The conference room was simple, with just a long, ovular table surrounded by dozens of chairs. Once all the guests were seated, the android stood at the head of the table and clapped its hands. "Settle down and we'll get on with the proceedings," it said, taking a seat and placing a briefcase on the table. Every eye in the room focused on the case. This is what they had come for.

The case opened with a satisfying click. Reaching in to grab a file papers, the android looked at everyone in turn. "What I am about to tell you is classified. You must not repeat anything said in this room to outsiders. Once disbanded, this meeting did not happen."

A chorus of nods and yeses prompted its next words.

"The first item up for bid is the ancient Aztec civilization. Bidding starts at 5000 Earthen dollars! Going once, going twice, sold to the Quarthen gentleman over there! Please prepare yourself to be sent back in time to become their god."